Apologies for the infrequent posts recently. Life has been pretty boring, even to me, and I haven't really been inspired to write anything. Well, I have been sort of working on this short story I started. I can already tell I'm going to have to almost completely rewrite it, but at least I'll have a first draft done...eventually.
So I was reading this article on CNN.com today about a rabbi who was training for the Boston Marathon. Being that the marathon falls during Passover, the rabbi had to find an alternative to bread and pasta for the typical pre-race carb load up. So he is going to load up on matzah and potatoes instead. Also, he will not be attending a seder on the 2nd night of Passover, preferring to rest up for the race instead of participating in what will undoubtedly be a long evening between preparing for the seder, having the seder, and clean up afterwards. As a rabbi, this is somewhat controversial because, as the leader of the community, he has a responsibility to set an example. However, he is a Reform or liberal/secular rabbi and, after much thought and consult with a Conservative rabbi, decided that it was okay. Plus, he's running for charity and that is still a mitzvah. I still don't know how I feel about him missing second seder. I'm also a reform Jew and fairly secular, but Passover has been one of the few holidays I've tried to observe pretty strictly. On top of that, we almost always did two seders at my house (My dad was raised Orthodox though admittedly not very well.), well, at least the first half. The first time I did the second half of the seder was when I was in college. Still, I feel that a rabbi should be held to a higher standard. Granted, he is running for charity which is always a good thing, and both of my rabbis have not been particularly traditional. However, for some reason, I've always been fairly particular about the traditions that I do observe, and feel that at least a rabbi would do the same, making some attempt to have a 2nd seder, even if it is abbreviated.
For those readers who don't know much about Passover (all 4 of you that I know about and a few others I suspect), I'll give a little background on Passover for your enlightenment. If you've ever read the Bible or turned on the TV during Passover, you should know the story of Exodus, the flight of the Jews from Egypt. Passover, a holiday that lasts for 8 days, celebrates the escape from Egypt. As one of the most important Jewish holidays, the seder is the most important aspect of the holiday, during which we retell the story of Exodus with various symbolic food elements. Now, I'll admit that some of my best memories growing up deal with the seder. Everybody always comes to our house, and I definitely remember having upwards of 15-20 people at our house for seder. The main reason that everyone comes to our house is that my mom is probably the best cook that any of our friends know, especially for large groups, and the Passover feast is easily the best meal that I had all year growing up. I'm going home next weekend for seder, and I am really excited. On a side note, I have never actually seen the Charlton Heston epic “The Ten Commandments” in its entirety. I know, I know, “The Ten Commandments” and “Fiddler on the Roof” are required viewing for Jews of all religions, and, while I saw “Fiddler” in Hebrew School, I've only ever seen about the first half of “The Ten Commandments.” I remember watching it when I was fairly young and always having to go to bed before it ended. In case you haven't seen it, I'm pretty sure the running time of the movie is 40 years in the desert. I have seen “The Prince of Egypt” though which is not on the required Jewish viewing list.
Perhaps the funniest moment I've ever been the star of, and I've been part of many, came during a seder probably close to 20 years ago by now. As is traditionally done in seders across the country, we were going around the table reading the Haggadah or Passover story aloud, and it was my turn. I was probably 6 or 7 at the time. Something very young though of reading age. Anyway, I was reading my passage and came across the word “miracles.” However, I did not in fact read the word “miracles.” Instead, in my gusto to prove how good of a reader I was, I said the word “mackerals.” Needless to say, this resulted in an inordinate amount of laughter and a story I have never forgotten.
The reality is that I've always been fairly impressed with how well my mom took to the Jewish traditions, despite being raised Catholic, albeit in Spain. For those of you who don't know about the place of religion in Spain, Spain has become an increasingly secular country even though it is still affiliated with the Catholic Church. Very few of my friends go to Church in Spain, let alone believe. My mom has no intentions of ever converting, though the only times I ever see my mom go to Church are Christmas, Easter, and when my abuela comes to visit, but never had an issue with my sister and I being raised Jewish. I once caused a minor tiff amongst my parents when I mentioned how my dad would never marry someone who wouldn't be willing to raise the kids Jewish. Apparently my mom did not know this when they first got engaged. Oops. My bad.
Part of the holiday also includes some fairly strict dietary restrictions. Chief among them is that we cannot eat leavened bread. This restriction stems from when the Jews fled their homes in Egypt. They did not have time to allow the bread to rise, resulting in a flat bread that is the ancestor of matzah. Matzah is perhaps one of my least favorite foods, and all you goyim who rave about how good it is and buy it during Passover, aren't forced to eat it and not much else for a week straight. Try it some time. Also, for those of you who don't know, the famous Last Supper of Jesus was actually a Passover Seder. (Contrary to popular belief, Jesus was not actually Christian but Jewish) Inspired to look up Da Vinci's “Last Supper” right now, I'm pretty sure there is bread on the table. Not very historically accurate. Tsk, Tsk.
This finally leads us to the actual inspiration for this post. In the interesting, but otherwise unimportant article, I found that apparently the writer of the story has quite a funny way with words. The article says: “Matzoh is known to have a binding effect on the digestive tract.” Now, I don't know how many people reading this have been required to eat only matzah for a full week, but if you have, you'll know that a “binding effect” is putting it lightly. One of the things that matzah is used to symbolize during the seder is the bricks that the Jewish slaves were forced to make in Egypt. That's a pretty good thing to have matzah symbolize because, after you eat enough of it, your digestive tract feels like it's lined with cement. Among the many side effects of have cement throughout your entire digestive tract is that it does wonders for your colon, and I mean that as sarcastically as possible. At least this rabbi will be running after only a couple days of Passover, because I couldn't imagine running towards the end of the week. Of course, the good thing about Passover is that you eat so little that you drop about 5 pounds, but then you gorge yourself on pizza as soon as it's over, so never mind. Until next time.
Music listened to while writing this blog: David Bowie-Best of Bowie If you aren't a Bowie fan, go be one. Bowie is awesome!
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